Month: May 2014

7 way to cope with depression

1. Identify whether or not you have depression and seek help if necessary:

There are many common symptoms associated with depression. If you identify with one or more of those listed below, seek advice from your doctor. Signs of depression include

  • Finding thinking or concentrating difficult, “foggy” thinking, inability to make clear decisions or forgetfulness
  • Pessimism, or feeling a sense that life is hopeless, pointless and futile This may even lead to a feeling of numbness
  • Body pains, cramps, digestive problems, headaches, and other aches that don’t go away with medication or treatment
  • Being irritable or restless a great deal of the time
  • Suicidal thoughts, thoughts about dying, or attempts at suicide

2. Ask your doctor to explore possible medical causes behind your depression.

Some depression results from, or is a side effect of, medical conditions or treatment for other medical conditions.It’s important for your doctor to identify any physical causes for depression that require specific treatments or to eliminate other reasons for your condition. Common medical conditions that might trigger depression include:

  • Thyroid problems, hormonal imbalances (including pre-menstrual) or disease.
  • Medications. The side effects of some medications include depression. Read the warning labels and talk with your doctor about any concerns you might have.
  • Addictions to alcohol or other drugs.
  • Genetic links to depression

3. Start your journey to wellness.

 it’s important to view getting well as a journey of gradual steps, rather than something with an instant cure. There will be times that your determination is challenged by self-questioning and despair, but this is precisely when you must do your best to avoid being “depressed about being depressed!” Here are good ways to start:

  • List the things that are bothering you outside of your depression. It could be unpaid bills, a lack of vacations or a tough job. In another column, write down some practical things that you think you can do to deal with the things that are bothering you. 
  • Be gentle on yourself. Life isn’t a race or a competition. The reality is that you matter, you have great value as a person and making things harder for yourself is akin to beating yourself up. Avoid obsessing about your depression or creating a shrine to it to hide behind when things all seem to hard. The feedback loop of hopelessness and despair created by being angry with yourself for being depressed will deepen your despair. Go back to naming your beast and setting it apart from who you are. Accept the journey to wellness is a matter of baby steps.

4. Research About Depression 

Learn what you can about depression. You don’t have to, and indeed should not, rely only on what the medical professionals tell you about the illness. Knowledge is an important way to reassure yourself that depression is real, that it is a concern to be treated with seriousness and that there are many ways to defeat it.

  • Visit your local library and borrow books about depression, anxiety, and happiness. Look in the psychology, self-help, therapy, and medical sections. For youth, ask about books specifically written for teenagers and children (children do get depression). You can also look at online auctions or book sites for affordable books about depression.
  • Visit trusted online resources targeted at your population. Government and national institutes set up for mental health treatment are reliable sources of information.
  • Helping recovery from depression through reading is referred to as “bibliotherapy”. If you’re motivated enough to take this path of recovery, it can be very beneficial. This method seems to be well suited to people who always turn to research as a way of answering anything they’re experiencing in life.

4. Keep a Journal 

Document your feelings somewhere personal and completely private. This will be the place where you let out your darkest thoughts, no holds barred, because you don’t need to worry that anyone will judge you for them. A diary can become your collaborator in the struggle against your depression because it eventually provides you with great evidence of what improves your mood as well as what brings it down

5. Take Care of your body

Your body needs to be well-nourished, well-rested, and cherished. If you’ve been neglecting it or pushing it too far, you will pay a price and part of that will result in lowered resiliency and openness to depressive thoughts.

6. Maintain a good support network. 

Support from people who love and care about you is an important part of the healing process. Tell people you trust that you’re depressed and would appreciate their understanding and sympathy.

  • Realize that some people will find this confrontational or upsetting if they’re also feeling down, and others may be dismissive. You’ll need to reach a decision yourself as to whether it’s worth explaining things further with them, or whether it’s just best to stay away from them until you’re more resilient.
  • Be willing to be honest about your irritability and reclusive behavior with those you trust. They need to know it’s not personal, but that you need space or time out every now and then.

7.  Change your thinking 

  • Acknowledge the feeling will pass. This can be a very difficult step, but it’s vital because it helps you to start banishing thoughts of hopelessness.
  • List all of your good points. When you’re depressed, it’s easy to understate the positive things about yourself. Turn this around by listing everything that is good about you. Include achievements from the past and hopes for the future, however few or random they may seem. If you can’t write this list, have a trusted friend or family member start one for you. This is a list to keep building upon as you work through your depression. Self-acceptance is a vital part of recovering from depression because you acknowledge that there are good things about yourself, but also that you cannot be perfect. This will help you stop judging yourself more harshly than anyone else.
  • Make decisions, however small, and act on them. Again, while this is very difficult to do during depression, it is a vital element in facing the sense of helplessness that tends to overwhelm depressed persons.Small decisions like getting out of bed, calling friends or cleaning up the kitchen all add up. Once you act on them, they become achievements.

 

Source: WikiHow.com

Bars & Melody – Simon Cowell’s Golden Buzzer act | Britain’s Got Talent

This is amazing. Today the music of the day is by these two lovely young kids. What i most loved about this video is that it is emotional and meaningful. A young child, writes his own raps based on his experience with bullying. I urge each and every individual to watch this video. if you know anyone who is currently facing bullying or any kind of violence or discrimination in their lives, then stand up, help them. Say No to Bullying

Dehumanization: Why Indian Babes can’t be Bhabhis

almostrelativism

I recently came across a respected e-newspaper slideshow titled ‘Bollywood bombshells we can never call Bhabhi’, representing various women from mainstream Bollywood who were tagged as ‘beautiful , having a toned body ‘ , and basically all words synonymous to sexy.

So that made me think – can women not be called bhabhis, or a dignified member of the family in an Indian household only because they wear a certain kind of clothes?

                                                                                                                                       

 Image

(link http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/entertainment/hindi/bollywood/Bollywood-bombshells-we-can-never-call-Bhabhi/photostory/33014907.cms )

 

Here are two…

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3 Bad Habits Women Pick Up From Cinema

Agreed

The Guru Project

Most of us would believe that life in India and Singapore cannot be any more different. We may like to think that Indian Cinema has hardly any effect on a first world nation like Sunny Singapore. I have listed 3 negative influences that still plague the Singapore Indian community  today regardless of all the modernisation and evolution that has apparently happened.

1. Thinking that You can Reform Him

What is it with these girls who think that their love is so unique that it will change their men.  There have too many movies where the hero is a gangster or embroiled in illegal activities and the heroine believes that her love will change him.  Ladies, firstly if you want to love someone, love him for who he is, instead of who you want him to be. The guy will change for nobody else but himself. Haven’t you heard the old adage…

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Why I Still Need My Mom

No Cigarettes, No Bologna

mom_jess_wedding It was 7:00 the morning of Emma’s First Communion, and I already had been up for two hours prepping for the intimate gathering  sacramental bender for 65 people following the ceremony.

My mom arrived earlier in the week, and we had been prepping ever since. We sipped coffee as our eyes scanned the room, our list-making brains doing their thing.

“The succulents don’t look right in that planter – they aren’t raised up enough or something.” I mumbled quietly to myself. Or so I thought.

But in the time it took for me to park Phoebe in front of Frozen, my mother had abandoned her coffee and disappeared. I looked out the kitchen window and there she was, in my backyard wearing her nightgown and robe, gathering bricks from my garage. Sweet Jesus. She’s collecting bricks to raise up the succulents.

IMG_4553

My mom is a fixer, a do-er, a…

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Help for parents with troubled teenagers

Today this post will be about how to help parents with troubled teenagers. Well firstly may i say that parenting is never an easy job and especially with teenagers. Sometimes your growing teen may be depressed, violent, abusive into alcohol or drugs, or maybe perhaps they might be engaging in reckless behavior. You may feel exhausted from lying awake at night worrying about where your child is, who he or she is with, and what they’re doing. You may despair over failed attempts to communicate, the endless fights, and the open defiance. Or you may live in fear of your teen’s violent mood swings and explosive anger. While parenting a troubled teen can often seem like an impossible task, there are steps you can take to ease the chaos at home and help your teen transition into a happy, successful young adult.

 

The Beginning 

As teenagers start to grow up and find their identity and independence in this world , they may experience behavioral changes that can seem bizarre and unpredictable to parents. You may now start to think, What happened to my sweet, adorable obedient child whom i couldn’t live a minute without but now my child doesn’t want to be seen near me or greets everything I say with a roll of the eyes or the slam of a door? Well unfortunately,theses are the actions of a normal teenager. . A troubled teen faces behavioral, emotional, or learning problems beyond the normal teenage issues. They may repeatedly practice at-risk behaviors such as violence, skipping school, drinking, drug use, sex, self-harming, shoplifting, or other criminal acts. Or they may exhibit symptoms of mental health problems like depression, anxiety, or eating disorders. Therefore I want to emphasize the point that parents should understand how important it is to be cautious of a normal adolescent behavior which may normal during adolescent development, and which can point to more serious problems.normal during adolescent development, and which can point to more serious problems. lead to a serious problem. 

Warning Signs of a Troubled Teenager 

1) Changing appearance can be a red flag if it’s accompanied by problems at school or other negative changes in behavior, or if there’s evidence of cutting and self-harm or extreme weight loss or weight gain.

2)Constant escalation of arguments, violence at home, skipping school, getting in fights, and run-ins with the law are all red flag behaviors that go beyond the norm of teenage rebellion.

3)Rapid changes in personality, falling grades, persistent sadness, anxiety, or sleep problems could indicate depressionbullying, or another emotional health issue. Take any talk about suicide seriously.

4) When alcohol or drug use becomes habitual, especially when it’s accompanied by problems at school or home, it may indicate a substance abuse issue or other underlying problems.

5)Red flags include a sudden change in peer group (especially if the new friends encourage negative behavior), refusing to comply with reasonable rules and boundaries, or avoiding the consequences of bad behavior by lying. Your teen spending too much time alone can also indicate problems.

Seeking Help 

If your child has one of the following warning signs of a troubled teenagers above then you must take action ASAP. Consult a counselor, therapist, or other mental health professional for help finding appropriate treatment. Whatever problems your teen is experiencing, it is not a sign that you’ve somehow failed as a parent. Instead of trying to assign blame for the situation, focus on your teen’s current needs. The first step to doing this is to find a way to connect with him or her.  To open the lines of communication you must :

1) Be aware of your own stress levels. If you’re angry or upset, now is not the time to try to communicate with your teen. Wait until you’re calm and energized before starting a conversation. You’re likely to need all the patience and positive energy you can muster.

2) Be there for your teen. An offer to chat with your teen over coffee will probably be greeted with a sarcastic put-down or dismissive gesture, but it’s important to show you’re available. Insist on sitting down for mealtimes together with no TV or other distractions, and attempt to talk to your teen then. Don’t get frustrated if your efforts are greeted by nothing more than monosyllabic grunts or shrugs; you may have to eat a lot of dinners in silence, but when your teen does want to open up, he or she will have the opportunity to do so.

3) Expect rejection. Your attempts to connect with your teen may often be met with anger, irritation, or other negative reactions. Stay relaxed and allow your teen space to cool off. Try again later when you’re both calm. Successfully connecting to your teen will take time and effort. Don’t be put off; persevere and the breakthrough will come.

4) Encourage exercise. Even a little regular exercise can help ease depression, boost energy and mood, relieve stress, regulate sleep patterns, and improve your teen’s self esteem. If you struggle getting your teen to do anything but play video games, encourage him or her to play activity-based video games or “exergames” that are played standing up and moving around simulating dancing, skateboarding, soccer, or tennis, for example. Once exercise becomes a habit, encourage your teen to try the real sport or to join a club or team.

5) Ensure your teen gets enough sleep. Sleep deprivation can make a teen stressed, moody, irritable, and lethargic, and cause problems with weight, memory, concentration, decision-making, and immunity from illness. You might be able to get by on six hours a night and still function at work, but your teen needs 8.5 to 10 hours of sleep a night to be mentally sharp and emotionally balanced. Encourage better sleep by setting consistent bedtimes, and removing TVs, computers, and other electronic gadgets from your teen’s room. the light from these suppresses melatonin production and stimulates the mind, rather than relaxing it. Suggest your teen tries listening to music or audio books at bedtime instead.

6) Take care of your self. Don’t be stressed and try to take care of both your health and you childrens health 

 

I hope this helps every parent out there. And I hope these solutions are sufficient enough to give you an understanding of the teenage behavior. 

Main Source: HelpGuide.org 

 

Thank You 

Bollywood vs. Reality

I couldn’t agree more 🙂

Jointly

So, as most of you know (or should know by this point), I am a little bit of a Bollywood* junkie. So much so that a few days ago one of my friends informed me that one of India’s largest film production company’s was searching for a fresh new face and my stomach doubled over with excitement. This is my break. Naturally, my dad shot the idea down so fast and went on that whole “have you seen the filth in those movies”. I’m assuming by “filth” he means that on-screen kisses are now common in Hindi films.

Regardless, in effort to make myself feel a tad bit better about my now dead dreams, I have decided to write this post.

The differences between Bollywood and real life.

Time

The concept of time is highly skewed in all Hindi films. You’re probably thinking, yeah K, obviously, it’s a story condensed…

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